Finding Security for Leadership
July 27, 2009
An important character quality for any leader who wants to make a significant impact and leave a positive legacy is security. Yet, security is seldom listed in job profiles as a desired quality. Secure leaders know who they are and what God has made them to do. They understand their strengths and weaknesses and are comfortable with both. Secure leaders fell less pressure to perform, less pressure to please people, and less pressure to prove their worth by their accomplishments than insecure leaders do. Secure leaders have an ease about them that engenders confidence among their followers. And, secure leaders attract strong leaders to work with them because they are not afraid to share the work and the rewards.
Many leaders are high achievers or over achievers. Often overachievement is a mask for deep insecurity. Insecurity, for many of us, is rooted in the psychological and emotional scars incurred during childhood. Many Christian leaders, including many high performance leaders, come from broken or dysfunctional families. Much could be written about the causes of insecurity, including these and others. But for our purposes, analyzing the causes is not essential. Let’s agree with the obvious! Insecurity affects most of us. Leaders, not matter how gifted, are not exempt.
The search for security is a primal human urge. That truth is self-evident. People, including leaders, want to and need to feel secure. We often go to great lengths in our search for security. The problem is we frequently pursue wrong sources for security. We look for security in accomplishment and relationships, often with catastrophic results.
A good example of this was the woman Jesus met at the well (John 4). She asked Jesus a question about religious achievement, “Where should we worship?” Jesus replied with a question about the whereabouts of her husband. This prompted her admission of multiple marriages and adultery. Her pattern of searching for security in relationships was unveiled.
Jesus did not answer her question about religious accomplishment (proper worship) or confront her misplaced search for security in relationships (serial marriages). Instead, he addressed her deepest needs. He promised he would come into her life and quench her deepest thirsts. He portrayed himself as a “spring of living water.” He challenged her to stop drawing from wrong wells and come to the true source of inner satisfaction.
Most people, including many leaders, look for security in accomplishments or relationships. Christian leaders make this more palatable by searching for security in religious accomplishments or religious relationships. Neither ultimately satisfies. A better source for security is available to every Christian leader.
First, however, it is important to diagnose the problem by revealing the symptoms of insecurity as they express themselves in leaders. Starting with a negative analysis may be discouraging. But before you can solve the problem, you must diagnose it. Many leaders have unhealthy behavior they would like to stop. They have patterns or habits that undermine their success. Yet, some inner drive repeatedly motivates the same destructive actions. That powerful inner drive is your search for security expressing itself in unhealthy ways. Over the next two weeks, we will look at four ways insecurity expresses itself through leaders in leadership situations.
If you have any of these symptoms, you will feel some dis-ease as you read! But that unsettledness can motivate significant change as you become more secure. Leading out of security, rather than insecurity, is essential to leaving a positive leadership legacy.
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Taking a Courageous Stand
July 20, 2009
Leaders must overcome fear because of the many situations in ministry that require courage. Circumstances that require courage in ministry include making decisions, changing a paradigm, risking new ventures, preaching prophetically, and enduring public vulnerability. Any of these can be a daunting task. Often these circumstances come in pairs or clusters - meaning the need for courage is increased exponentially.
Making decisions is a key function of leaders. While that seems obvious, it is amazing how many leaders struggle to make decisions. Leaders know the daily pressure of analyzing situations and making the best decision possible. We often decide complex issues. We work with limited information, sometimes on a short timetable. We do not always know all the facts. We decide based on what we know. That’s hard, especially when all the facts simply cannot be known given the time allotted for the decision.
Leaders often make “best guess” decisions. We work with deadlines, without the luxury of interminable delay. Leaders make the call – up or down, win or lose, right or wrong. Some decisions, fortunately, are routine with limited consequences. But some are more significant. Those require courage to put your judgment and reputation on the line, often in a public forum with very public consequences.
In rare or dramatic circumstances, a leader must take a courageous stand on an issue of incredible significance. One pastor took a significant stand when he discovered his church leaders were secretly involved in a white supremacy group. Another ministry leader lost his job when he publicized financial irregularities in his organization (which later collapsed from mismanagement). A deacon led his church to confront a popular pastor who was stealing church funds. A pastor dismissed a much-loved worship leader for involvement with pornography, and then bore additional criticism when he insisted the church support the young man through a recovery program.
Ministry leaders also take courageous stands on public issues. Taking stands on abortion, same-sex marriage, sex outside of marriage, homosexual behavior, and sex education programs in public schools are all part of ministry leadership these days.
One of the best examples of a courageous stand is the young men who found themselves in a fiery furnace (Dan. 3). King Nebuchadnezzar ordered everyone to bow down and worship a large statue of himself. Shadrach, Meschah, and Abednego refused. They were tossed into the fiery furnace, blazing so hot it killed the men who threw them in. God protected them and brought them out alive. That’s the good news, the happy ending.
But when they went into the furnace they had no assurance they would come out. They did not take their stand because they knew they would be protected. They took it because they knew it was right. In fact, their explanation to the king was clear. “If the God we serve exists, then he can rescue us from the furnace of blazing fire, and he can rescue us from the power of you, the king. But
even if he does not rescue us, we want you as king to know that we will not worship your gods or the golden statue you set up” (Daniel 3:17-18).
This story reveals several ingredients for a courageous stand. First, be sure you choose a worthy issue. Know the difference between a whim, preference, perspective, proverb, principle, conviction, and law. Second, be sure it matters. Asking, “Is this a hill you want to die on?” is a legitimate question. Not everything deserves a courageous stand. Compromise is not always a dirty word. Three, be responsible for your actions and their results. Courage acts no matter the consequences. Only fools expect to be bailed out. Fourth, be prepared to suffer. God never promises to bail out every leader who takes a stand. When Paul was jailed in Phillipi, God sent an earthquake to save him (Acts 16:25). Later, however, he spent two years in jail waiting resolution of his case (Acts 24:27). God is not obligated to save you and does not always bail out courageous leaders. Sometimes, God allows leaders to suffer.
Showing courage begins with confronting immobilizing fear. As you confront fear, facing it with the strategies outlined in this chapter, your courage will grow. As it grows, you can expect God to allow ever-greater tests for you. The longer you lead, the more challenging the situations God will allow you to face. Doing what is right may cost you. But, in those critical moments, do not let fear of what might happen keep you from doing the right thing.
While God often delivers, what if he doesn’t and the worst happens? Then you can say with Paul, “To live is Christ, but to die gain” (Phil. 1:21). Heaven is the worst thing that can happen to you!
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Strategies for developing courage-Part 2
July 13, 2009
Last week we started on a list of seven resources to overcome fear or develop courage. The foundational asset is salvation in Jesus Christ. The other six strategies build on that sure foundation. Here are the final four.
4. Pray…hard! While my short prayer, “Father, here we go,” (see last week) is helpful on the spot –more prayer is needed to overcome the stronghold of fear. “I sought the Lord and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears” is one leader’s impassioned testimony (Psalm 34:4). Sometimes, fearful situations are ongoing. They test us over a prolonged period of time. The fear monster, seemingly slain, rears itself time and again.
One young man’s struggle to enter ministry illustrates prayer as a strategy to overcome fear. He had many fears about the ministry based on his observations of ministry leaders, particularly his father who had been through many unfortunate ministry conflicts as a leader. Every time he considered entering ministry, his fears of what might happen to him, to his family, and to his future short-circuited the decision. He had to pray through his fears.
It took months but he finally committed himself to ministry and now serves effectively. His fears were deeply rooted in his experiences as a child watching his father deal with very negative situations. A significant breakthrough came when he realized that his father, while he had suffered some very unfair treatment, had not given up on the church or the ministry. My young friend realized he was allowing fear to control him. After months of prayer, he came to realize God’s confidence that enabled him to answer God’s call to ministry. Through prayer, he gained the insight needed to confront his fears and move forward.
The Psalmist “sought the Lord” which implies more than a casual prayer. The tone implies persistent praying. Sometimes, a short prayer produces the needed change. But more often, when it comes to overcoming fear, it takes longer to pray through. Cracking the stronghold of fear requires focused prayer, use of scripture in prayer, careful mediation while praying, and discerning the Spirit’s promptings about the causes and solutions to the fear-producing situation.
5. Take action in faith. Several biblical leaders (listed two weeks ago), were afraid or were told not to be afraid. The good news is you are in good company when you, as a leader, struggle with fear. One of the strategies these leaders demonstrate is taking action in faith
while you are still afraid.
James 2:17 says, “…faith, if it doesn’t have works, is dead….” Taking action in faith is required of leaders. You will never be free from all fear. You may confront it with truth, pray through it, celebrate God’s presence, and still be afraid. Some fear only flees when a leader stares it down and takes action in spite of feeling afraid.
Ezra, the Old Testament prophet, dramatically illustrates this principle. Surrounded by enemies of his effort to restore the Temple, Ezra led the people to resume the sacrificial worship system. “They set up the altar on its foundation and offered burnt offerings for the morning and evening on it to the Lord
even though they feared the surrounding peoples.” Sometimes, leaders must take action even though they are still afraid. Waiting until you are fear-free means you are unlikely to act boldly as a leader.
Preparing to share the gospel, meet a critic, handle a personnel problem, or attend a difficult meeting can be fear-inducing. Often, however, what we imagine might happen is far worse than what does happen. Do not be immobilized by fear. Move ahead purposefully. Trust God to make fear flee as you confidently take action by faith.
6. Enjoy God’s love. We have a scripture plaque in our bedroom, hung when we were first married and moved with us to every place we have called home. It says, “There is no fear in love; instead, perfect love drives out fear, because fear involves punishment” (1 John 4:18). The plaque reminds us love drives away fear, including the fearful situations we face as a couple. Love overcomes fear, not only in marriage, but in other significant relationships.
Much we fear involves punishment. Fear is often rooted in performance or performance-related expectations. If you do not perform up to a certain standard, real or imagined, you fear you will be judged. God does not relate to you that way. God loves you, case closed!
So where does this kind of devilish (hint!) thinking come from? The Evil One is determined to undermine you any way he can. Since you have discovered God’s love expressed through Christ, you would think you would never doubt his love for you. But that is not the case. As a Christian leader, you can still doubt God’s love. You would never express it that bluntly, but you express it plainly by how you act.
You still work to prove your worth, strain to demonstrate your value, base your self-esteem on what others think or say about you, and measure your success by external achievements like buildings, budgets, or baptisms. When you do these things, you deny the love of God. God’s love is about acceptance, security, rest, and a profound sense of worth because of his relationship to you.
A good word for this self-inflicted mental punishment is “condemnation.” Many leaders are punished by fear through the condemnation they feel and struggle to overcome. Leaders who fear they can never do enough or never quite measure up are victims of the internal condemnation fear produces. These kind of condemning strongholds are the deep wounds that drive insecure leaders.
The solution is to enjoy God’s love for you. “Enjoy” might not be a word you are comfortable using to describe how you experience God’s love. We tend to think how unworthy we are, how gracious God is, and therefore how parsimonious we need to be with God’s love. In other words, we like it but we need to use it in small doses so as not to exhaust the supply.
God’s love is unlimited. Enjoy it. Revel in it. Drink deeply from the well. Let God’s love immerse you. God’s love is perfect and perfect love, enjoyed thoroughly, will drive out fear. It really will. As you rest securely in God’s love, condemnation ceases, self-punishment stops, and fear diminishes.
7. Obey God’s laws. Moving from enjoying God’s love to obeying God’s laws may seem like an abrupt change of direction and perspective. Not really. God’s laws, commands, and instructions are definitive expressions of his love. In other words, God knows what’s good for you and tells you plainly. There is no guesswork with God on certain issues. He wants his people to be blessed and warns that certain behavior is too destructive to tolerate.
Both the Old and New Testaments have clear warnings about how fearful it is to disobey God. God warns in Leviticus 26:15-16, “If you reject my statutes and despise my ordinances, and do not observe all my commands – and break my covenant, then I will do this to you; I will bring terror on you….” Similar language is in Hebrews 10:26-27, “For if we deliberately sin after receiving the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins, but a terrifying expectation of judgment….” Terror and terrifying expectation of judgment await the person who willfully disobeys God.
When you obey God’s clear instructions many common fears become irrelevant. Like a toothless tiger, these fears can growl but they have no bite. Your obedience renders some fearful situations completely powerless. Resolving some fears is just this simple. Obey God! Get under the protective covering of his Word on clearly “right or wrong” issues. When God gives clear directions, obey him and enjoy safety and absence of fear. Disobedience leads to terror and terrifying judgment. If you are willfully disobeying God, you should be afraid! Nothing will help you until you repent and obey Him.
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Strategies for developing courage-Part 1
July 6, 2009
There are seven biblical strategies for overcoming fear. Stated another way, these are strategies for developing courage. While the first one is foundational, the other six are not sequential. They are, instead, strategies you can continually use to confront and overcome your fears as a leader.
1. Be saved. Salvation in Jesus Christ is foundational to overcoming fear. In a broader context about salvation, Romans 8:15 says, “For you did not receive a spirit of slavery to fall back into fear….” Your salvation experience with Jesus breaks the power of sin in your life. Sin is still very much a force in our world, but it no longer has control of you as a believer or as a leader. Apart from this foundational spiritual relationship and its liberating results, you have no hope for facing down your fears.
You can face your fears and lead when you still feel afraid because of your salvation in Jesus Christ. Every other strategy emerges from this relationship. Without this relationship, every other strategy is a dead work of the flesh. Handling fear is a spiritual battle, not a psychological ploy. Facing fear is a spiritual reality, often fought on the battlefield of your mind.
Romans 8:15 continues “…but you received the Spirit of adoption, by whom we cry out, ‘Abba, Father!’” Some relationships have special privileges. As a Christian, you can cry out to your Father because you enjoy a unique relationship with him. You are his child – his son or daughter. My children have certain privileges that come from their relationship with me. They can call me any time, day or night, and have my help with any problem. They can access my resources and will someday receive an inheritance. Relationships have privileges.
2. Practice God’s presence. God is your Father. Better than any earthly father, he is always with you. Learning to live this reality is not a psychological trick; it’s a spiritual reality. The Psalmist wrote “The Lord is with me; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?” (Psalm 118:6 NIV).
This simple affirmation, “God is with me; I will not be afraid” is a powerful resource to remind a leader he or she is not alone. There is something very comforting about companionship, about knowing we are not alone in a difficult situation. When my oldest son was about four, we went to a church building late one Saturday night. All the lights were off. We entered the auditorium on the opposite side from the light switches and were quietly shuffling our way through the dark. His little hand felt its way into my hand – and it sure felt good! While my son was reaching out in the dark for his dad, I was just glad to have
anyone with me. Dark church buildings can be scary places.
Sometimes, well-lit church buildings can also be scary places. Some worship services demand prophetic preaching, committee meetings require hard decisions, counseling sessions call for tough love, board meetings deal with controversial issues, and staff meetings can feel like combat zones. In every one of these situations, leaders feel fear but must lead anyway.
Leading while afraid is possible when you remember God is with you. He is with you when you preach, when you lead a difficult meeting, when you referee relational conflicts, when you make controversial decisions, and when you face competing agendas. God is with you. One of my favorite prayers underscores the reality of God’s presence with me as a leader. It’s a short, simple prayer, “Father, here we go.”
The emphasis is on “we.” I pray this prayer before I stand up to preach. I have often stopped outside a meeting room, with my hand on the doorknob, and prayed “Father, here we go.” I pray this prayer before entering almost any difficult situation. “Father, here we go” reminds me God is with me. I do not ask him to accompany me; he
is always with me. This prayer changes my perspective, puts my fears in their place, and gives me confidence that I am not alone. Military men go into battle with the buddy system – partners who watch each other’s back and commit to bringing each other home alive. What a great picture of God’s presence - the ultimate buddy system for Christian leaders.
3. Confront fear with truth. “You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free” (John 8:32) is oft quoted and applied in many situations. Does it apply to confronting fear? Absolutely. John often combines the themes of truth and light (for example, John 12:35-36), building on the Old Testament use of these images. In Psalms, for example, walking in the light (truth) is connected to overcoming fear when the Psalmist writes, “The Lord is my light and my salvation,” and then asks, “Whom should I fear?” (Ps. 27:1).
The answer to this rhetorical question is “No one!” God provides light – truth – for us to walk in and doing so overcomes fear. So many fears are irrational or caused by imaginary enemies, situations, or possible results. The
What if monster roams the mind of every leader creating various scenarios of what might happen.
What if people become angry with me, our ministry is hurt by my decision, we are making a huge mistake, it costs more money than we planned (it always does, by the way!), the project takes longer than we thought, a personnel decision does not work out, and on and on and on.
Fear paralyzes leaders with questions about what
might happen. Leaders are responsible to consider options, imagine possible outcomes, and manage strategies that may need to be adjusted on the fly. That’s what leaders do. But stewing inwardly, having your gut in a knot all the time about what might happen is not effective contingency management. Fear has the upper hand when that is a leader’s experience.
Confronting fear with truth can be done in two ways. First, confront fear with biblical truth. Memorize key verses (like some in this chapter) that underscore what the Bible says about fear. Memorize passages that remind you of the core spiritual resources you have in your relationship with God. Meditate on the truth in these passages to change your thinking about fear.
Second, confront fear with what is true about your situation. Too often, our mind races through wild scenarios about what might happen and how bad it will be. When that happens, you need a reality check! What is the worst that could happen? You could lose your job. And then you would get another one. You could lose some friends. And then you would make new ones. You might die! But then you would be in heaven. This is not to make light of the painful, difficult results from some decisions a ministry leader has to make. But it does put our losses in perspective. The reality of what we imagine might happen to us is generally not as bad as what does happen to us.
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